A Gentleman’s Guide To Cunnilingus
|
Posted:Feb 3, 2015 1:58 am
Last Updated:Feb 4, 2015 10:34 pm
6013 Views
|
Carpet - munching. Muff diving. Pleasing her beaver. Chowing her box. Licking her honeypot. Sniffing her roses. Nibbling her peach. There’s lots of ways of saying it, but we’re gonna call it cunnilingus. And from what girl friends report too often a twentysomething guy is somewhat virginal when it comes to sticking his face in her special place. I gotta stand up for guys on this one. For three reasons – one, few dudes are lucky enough to have anyone show them what to do; two, each women is so different sexually it can sometimes feel like you’re learning everything all over again; three, as guys we expect competency from ourselves and we shy away from doing what we don’t feel comfortable doing. Now, I’m not letting guys off the hook. But I’m in your corner. I wanted to compile this to help men and women alike. What I mean is, this is meant for men, but the results benefit straight women, too. (I assume lesbians don’t need any advice from me, but you’re welcome to read on, and I’m flattered if you do). This informal guide is to help any dude surprise the next woman he gets naked with, by not just going down on her and clumsily trying to eat her out, but instead, he’ll know how to nibble on her peach with his lips, his tongue, his whole face like it was the ripest peach he’d ever been lucky enough to enjoy. That’s what we’re going for here.
I’m no expert. I was just lucky enough to have a few older women take me by the hand, bed my ass down and show me how to make a woman’s vagina happy. Sensing my enthusiasm, they were willing teachers. In the past you may not have been eager to chow box, but I’m betting once you feel comfortable, once you know what you’re doing and once you can reliably drive a woman to orgasm with just your tongue and mouth, you may feel differently. You may find you’re more eager to suck on her honeypot.
A guy likes to be good at whatever he does. And since each woman’s sexuality is a mystery, we’re gonna consider lots of different tools you can use to help solve each mystery you meet. But I warn you, there is no mastery of a vagina. You can master Tetris but you can’t master something that changes like the weather. All you get to do is enjoy teasing and pleasing them. And that’s the first step. Become a fan of vaginas.
Time for some unspoken truth. Most guys secretly believe great sex means their dick is the prime focus, the star of the picture. And like a priapic porn star, we think it’s some awesome fucking when we’re pumping away like a well-lubed Saudi oil well. Throw out that porno thinking. These day we’re blessed with more porn stars than we rightly deserve, and as much as we love their work, learning to fuck from porn stars is like learning to start a small business from your local heroin dealer. (now you might not have a local heroin dealer, if so, check you out, you’re doing something right). The point is you don’t wanna fuck like a self-obsessed porn star. Expand the focus of your sexuality from your love stick to your whole body and her whole body.
They call it muff-diving because you should be enthusiastic. Dive in face-first with gusto. Let her feel your desire to pull her body up against your face, to inhale her, to divide her with your tongue and taste her. Let her feel how long you’ve waited to be between her legs, how you’ve lusted to slide face-first into her. Don’t say it in words. Don’t say anything at all. Just let her feel it. (I’ll try not to let this devolve into a romance novel. I know we’re teetering on the line).
Very important – don’t rush to the vagina. Enjoy the curves of her body. All the way down. Possibly go kissing past her pussy on your way to her calves and ankles. Then slowly make your way back up to her waiting pearly gates. Tease her with expectation the whole time. Run your lips like feathers over her skin, massage her body, hands don’t need to be anywhere near her vagina to be totally involved. Remember that. Before you get to her vagina, play small games of anticipation. Let her desperately want what she can’t have until finally you give her what she wants and you press your lips against hers. The satisfaction will be far more immense.
Approach with your whole face. Graze her vagina as you nuzzle her clitoris with the bridge of your nose. And then let your tongue show up to the pussy party and part her labia like Moses spreading the Red Sea. And no, that’s not a menstruation joke (but it could be).
Most women are shaved these days. Which means, you gotta think a sec before you rub your face all over the most sensitive sections of her body. If you haven’t shaved your face recently and you feel stubbly, don’t go crazy rubbing your facial sandpaper on her crotch. She’ll want to kill you the next day – and you don’t want that.
A woman once told me cunnilingus is just like you’re eating ice cream. You want to apply a good amount of pressure with your tongue but not so much you knock the scoop off the cone. You wanna lick her firmly with your tongue so you can get a good taste and savor her flavor. Sometimes you kinda wanna kiss and squeeze the ice cream with your lips. And you definitely wanna suck and use your tongue in just about every direction and approach it from all sorts of angles.
It’s always nice to give your tongue a break, mix it up and maybe bring in a few fingers for some variety. But this is important – ONLY if you have trimmed nails. If you don’t cut your shit, keep your hands to yourself. If your fingers are pussy-friendly use your digits like a finger painter. You want them to always be moist, and always sliding and swirling and rubbing but not really poking, prodding, or jabbing. Slippery and graceful. Artistically playful. And always with moist fingers. You might wanna start with sliding in a finger as you tongue her clitoris, but don’t rush it. Her breathing will tell you everything. With time she might enjoy more fingers, might not. If you’re unsure, you can ask how it all feels for her and if she wants more or less. Never hesitate to ask questions. This is the ultimate ABC: Always Be Curious.
I assume you can find a clitoris. If not, it’s at the top of her vagina, where her labia meet, it’s covered by a hood of flesh. If you rub on her clitoral hood, it’ll come out to play. Some women like vigorous action. Some insist you be super gentle. All I can tell you is, don’t actually flick her bean, just rub her clitoris with your fingers, kinda mash and circle it with your tongue, vary what you’re doing, with both pressure and approach. Pay attention to what elicits moans. Mix it up. And ignore the male tendency to “dial it in,” there is no one way to please a clitoris. It can be different on a day-to-day basis for the same woman. Just see what pleases her that day, in that naked moment.
After teasing and pleasing her clitoris awhile, once it’s present and excited, you can try gently sucking on it. Suck it into your mouth. Roll her clitoris across your lips. Maybe enhance the feeling with trembling lips. Nibble on her clitoris with your lips. Pull her clitoris further into your mouth and let your tongue rub against it. Up and down motions, soft circles, and back and forth like tiny slaps that are actually more like licks.
While you’re doing all this you might wanna stroke her thighs with widespread fingers, rake them slowly, letting her feel your passion for her in each drag of a fingertip. It’s almost like clawing but just with the ends of your fingers – not the nails. Unless she’s into that – and if so, rock on. Either way, let it feel somewhat primal and hungry as you pull her body against your face. Let her feel desired.
If you wanna give good oral sex, pay attention to the woman’s comfort. Most likely, no matter how cool and confident she looks like, on the inside she’s probably a ball of insecurities, and pretty certain she and her vagina don’t measure up to media standards, and she probably assumes she doesn’t compare favorably to other woman you’ve been with. You don’t want her thinking like that when you’re face deep, giving her close-up attention. Help her relax so she can enjoy you tongue pleasing, without being stuck in her head, or worse yet, pretending to enjoy it. You want her fully relaxed so she’s aware of every flutter of your tongue.
Here are 5 general guidelines to keep in mind:
Softer than you think, slower is better, and use lots of variety.
Before, during and after everything, always make sure she’s comfortable.
Use everything, you hands, your tongue, your nose, your cheeks, everything.
It’s oral sex but involve her whole body, breasts, thighs, hips, back and butt.
Enjoy yourself and make sure she feels as lucky and as good as you do.
A man always feels more confident when he knows what he’s doing. With practice he can become an artisan, an expert, able to do wonderful things. When you get better at giving a woman pleasure your whole life will change. I know, that sounds like bullshit. It kinda is. But it’s also totally true. Whenever you improve at something you gain confidence in other aspects of your life. Some things give a little more kick in your step than others. If you know that last night you curled a woman’s toes and turned her into a moaning, writhing orgasm machine, using just your tongue, trust, the next morning you’ll walk a little taller. Learn to please women’s vaginas and your future self will thank you. It used to be you were less of a man if you ate pussy. Now, you’re way more of a man if you give good cunnilingus. So be a gentleman and really learn to please your lady.
|
|
|
4
Comments
|
|
Performing Cunnilingus
|
Posted:Feb 2, 2015 11:51 pm
Last Updated:May 11, 2024 5:22 am
5741 Views
|
Some people consider oral sex the most intimate of all sex acts. Cunnilingus, the technical term for performing oral sex on a woman, can be incredibly intimate. To be good at it you have to be an excellent reader of her body, her breathing, her movements, and what she may be telling you with words.
Everything you do is for your partner in that moment and not based on a performance expectations, lessons from porn, or previous oral sex experiences. It can be a bit Zen...but with more saliva. If you've got the basics covered, check out our advanced cunnilingus technique.
Here's How:
Clean yourself up!
Make sure your hands are clean, and your nails are trimmed as you'll probably want to use your hands as well as your mouth on her. If you have facial hair and shave regularly, be sure to do it now, nothing kills the mood quite like sandpaper on her sensitive parts.
Get wet.
A lot of people have preconceived notions about the taste and/or smell of their partner’s genitals. If you're anxious about this, suggest a romantic bath or shower together and then go down on her. Getting naked and wet with each other is never a bad idea, and as you get more comfortable you will probably find that your partners taste and smell trigger more arousal than anything else. Some people use flavored lubricants, and many dental dams (great for safer sex) are flavored also.
Start slowly.
Most women won’t want to go from zero to oral sex in 30 seconds. Take your time and ease into it. Do other things you know she loves. Use your hands and mouth all over her body—which will nicely foreshadow what is to come. When she’s good and excited—her hips are thrusting and the moans pretty regular, head south.
Get comfortable.
Both of you will enjoy this more if you’re both physically comfortable. Use pillows and be creative with oral sex positions so that you are both relaxed and feel like you can move around. Some people will find it hard on their neck to lie between their partners legs with their head poised over her vulva. For others this will work just great. Remember that it’s okay to change positions and move around.
Get the lay of the land.
If you don’t have the body parts, you may want to brush up on your female genital anatomy . Most of the attention with cunnilingus is on the clitoris, but every woman is different, and there may be other parts of her that will take oral sex from the everyday to the out of this world. Use your fingers to spread her lips and take a good look at her clitoris, her labia, her mons, her vagina, her perineum and her anus.
When in doubt, go slow.
A lot of women have very sensitive clitorises, so avoid stampeding to the clitoris. Flatten your tongue and use wide slow strokes to explore her inner and outer lips, her vagina, and her clitoris. Imagine licking an ice cream cone. Start at the perineum and lick up and around her clit and back down the other side.
Check the hood.
Most women prefer to have their clitorises licked through the clitoral hood. This is a fold of skin that covers the actual glans of the clitoris, which is extremely sensitive.
Experiment with different strokes.
In general, women tend to like firm pressure and repetitive motion. Quick tongue flicks against the clitoris can be irritating. If you’re not sure, ask her to give you feedback while you try different kinds of strokes—circular, side-to-side, up-and-down. Don’t take it personally if she flinches—discovering what pleases is often a process of trial and error—just try something else.
Let her give you a hand.
If you've ever seen her masturbate, you have some idea how she likes her clit to be touched. Ask her to show you now, or you can offer her your hand and ask her to demonstrate the kind of stroking she prefers by placing hers on top of yours.
Use your mouth.
Take her clitoris in your mouth and gently suck on it. Use your mouth to suck on or nibble her labia.
Add penetration.
When she’s good and excited, add some lubricant to your fingers or toy and gently insert it into her vagina. Move them in and out using short but firm strokes. Put your mouth back on her clitoris and lick her while you penetrate her. This won’t do it for all women, but many love the experience of clitoral stimulation and penetration.
Keep a steady pace, try not to stop.
Women like steady stimulation, so don’t stop unless you need to come up for air. You’ll see the signs when she’s getting ready to go over the top—her moans, her thighs pressing against your head, her body arching, her hands tightening on your head! She’ll let you know when to stop.
Tips:
Don't forget the rest of her body. In terms of what's nearby, you can incorporate the perineum and vaginal opening into your oral sex. Let your tongue travel down and pop in and out of the vagina occasionally.
If you are using a sex toy for penetration, she might prefer to work the dildo or vibrator inside her while you're licking. This allows you to concentrate, and her to get the rhythm she likes best.
If your mouth or tongue tires, give it a rest, but replace the stimulation with your hand or a vibrator (unless she wants a rest too).
Male partners need to know that it can take women longer to come than men, and many women are anxious about this. Whatever you do, don't make her feel bad about how long it's taking, and hang in there for the long haul. If you need to stop or change things up, that’s okay, but don’t make it about her “taking too long”.
|
|
|
0
Comments
|
|
|
|
A warm n wet welcome to Kisser-King's Blog!
|
Posted:Feb 2, 2015 2:48 am
Last Updated:Feb 2, 2015 11:49 pm
4991 Views
|
Hi there  ,
Thanks for visiting my sacred place. A place where I share with you thoughts which are dear to me and things am passionate about.
Please feel free to leave your feedback / comments. Happy browsing.
|
|
|
0
Comments
|
|
To link to this blog (Classy_Sexy_Bull) use [blog Classy_Sexy_Bull] in your messages.
|
|
|
| Sun |
Mon |
Tue |
Wed |
Thu |
Fri |
Sat |
1
|
23
|
31
|
4
|
5
|
6
|
7
|
8
|
9
|
10
|
11
|
12
|
13
|
14
|
15
|
16
|
17
|
18
|
19
|
20
|
21
|
22
|
23
|
24
|
25
|
26
|
27
|
28
|
|
