The Cock Farmer.
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Posted:Dec 29, 2013 2:17 pm
Last Updated:May 7, 2024 6:46 pm
21416 Views
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  The Cock Farmer.
A woman walks into her accountant's office and tells him that she needs to file her taxes. The accountant says, "Before we begin, I'll need to ask a few questions." He gets her name, address, social security number, etc. and then asks, "What is your occupation?"
The woman replies, "I'm a ."
The accountant balks and says, "No, no, no. That will never work. That is much too crass. Let's try to rephrase that."
The woman, "OK, I'm a ."
"No, that is still too crude. Try again." They both think for a minute, then the woman states, "I'm a cock farmer."
The accountant asks, "What does cock farming have to do with being a ?"
"Well, I raised over 5,000 cocks last year." 
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Really funny statements.
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Posted:Dec 29, 2013 2:08 pm
Last Updated:May 7, 2024 6:46 pm
19463 Views
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 Here are some funny statements that should give you a laugh.
Man who wants pretty nurse, must be patient.
Passionate kiss, like spider web, leads to undoing of fly.
Lady who goes camping must beware of evil in-tent.
Squirrel who runs up woman's leg will not find nuts.
Man who leaps off cliff jumps to conclusion.
Man who runs in front of car gets tired.
Man who runs behind car gets exhausted.
Man who eats many prunes get good run for money.
Man who fight with wife all day get no piece at night.
It takes many nails to build a crib but only one screw to fill it.
Man who drives like hell is bound to get there.
Man who fish in other man's well often catch crabs.
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]"What A Wife Says And What She Means!"
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Posted:Jun 27, 2013 3:51 pm
Last Updated:May 7, 2024 6:46 pm
23404 Views
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 Finally the info so many married men have been waiting for. The truth behind.... "What A Wife Says And What She Means!"
The wife says: You want
The wife means: You want
The wife says: We need
The wife means: I want
The wife says: It's your decision
The wife means: The correct decision should be obvious
The wife says: Do what you want
The wife means: You'll pay for this later
The wife says: We need to talk
The wife means: I need to complain
The wife says: Sure... go ahead
The wife means: I don't want you to
The wife says: I'n not upset
The wife means: Of course I'm upset you moron
The wife says: You're ... so manly
The wife means: You need a shave and sweat a lot
The wife says: Be romantic, turn out the lights
The wife means: I have flabby thighs.
The wife says: This kitchen is so inconvenient
The wife means: I want a new house.
The wife says: I want new curtains.
The wife means: Also carpeting, furniture, and wallpaper!
The wife says: I need wedding shoes.
The wife means: The other forty pairs are the wrong shade of white.
The wife says: Hang the picture there
The wife means: No, I mean hang it there!
The wife says: I heard a noise
The wife means: I noticed you were almost asleep.
The wife says: Do you love me?
The wife means: I'm going to ask for something expensive.
The wife says: How much do you love me?
The wife means: I did something today you're not going to like.
The wife says: I'll be ready in a minute.
The wife means: Kick off your shoes and take an hour nap.
The wife says: Am I fat?
The wife means: Tell me I'm beautiful.
The wife says: You have to learn to communicate.
The wife means: Just agree with me.
The wife says: Are you listening to me?
The wife means: [Too late, your doomed.]
The wife says: Yes
The wife means: No
The wife says: No
The wife means: No
The wife says: Maybe
The wife means: No
The wife says: I'm sorry
The wife means: You'll be sorry
The wife says: Do you like this recipe?
The wife means: You better get used to it
The wife says: All we're going to buy is a soap dish
The wife means: I'm coming back with enough to fill this place.
The wife says: Was that the baby?
The wife means: Get out of bed and walk him
The wife says: I'm not yelling!
The wife means: Yes I am! I think this is important!
In answer to the question "What's wrong?"
The wife says: The same old thing.
The wife means: Nothing.
The wife says: Nothing.
The wife means: Everything.
The wife says: Nothing, really.
The wife means: It's just that you're an idiot.
The wife says: I don't want to talk about it.
The wife means: I'm still building up steam.
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Big D and Syb Gets Amazing Penis Enlarger.
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Posted:Jun 7, 2012 10:29 am
Last Updated:May 7, 2024 6:46 pm
31431 Views
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The other night Polly and I was visiting with our friends Big D and Mrs D. The wives suggested me and my buddy Big D, get ourselves one of those amazing penis enlargers. So we did. She's 25, brunette, and her name's Kathy.
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Warning about Acme Penis Company!!
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Posted:Dec 24, 2011 12:50 pm
Last Updated:Jun 7, 2012 10:29 am
32804 Views
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 Hi Everyone. I thought I had better warn everyone!!!
Be careful what you purchase from the ACME Penis Supply Company.
I spent $50.00 on a deluxe guaranteed penis enlarger.
Bastards sent me a magnifying glass, with nstructions that said don't use in the sunlight.
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Polly's new photo.
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Posted:Dec 13, 2011 12:40 pm
Last Updated:May 7, 2024 6:46 pm
31341 Views
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Syb took a naughty  photo of me for our profile and blog. Hope you like, Polly.
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Naughty things you hear at Thanksgiving.
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Posted:Nov 17, 2011 5:23 am
Last Updated:May 7, 2024 6:46 pm
31638 Views
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Every year around Thanksgiving these are a few naughty things you may have heard being said. 
1. Talk about a huge breast.
2. Tying the legs together keeps the insides moist.
3. It's cool whip time.
4. If I don't undo my pants, I'll burst.
5. Thats one good looking spread.
6. I'm in the mood for a little dark meat.
7. Are you ready for seconds yet.
8. It's a little dry, do you still wanna eat it?
9. Just wait your turn, you'll get some.
10. Don't play with your meat.
11. Just spread the legs open and stuff it in.
12. Do you think you'll be able to handle all these people at once?
13. I didn't expect everyone to come all at once.
14. You still have a little bit on your chin.
15. How long will it take after you stick it in.
16. You'll know it's ready when it pops up.
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Pumpkin or Pussy?
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Posted:Oct 28, 2011 9:05 am
Last Updated:May 7, 2024 6:46 pm
31658 Views
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Which is better to eat? Pumpkin  or pussy 
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Just marriage jokes.
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Posted:Oct 2, 2011 6:59 am
Last Updated:May 7, 2024 6:46 pm
31525 Views
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 Me and my buddy Big D, jotted down some stuff about marriage, while drinking 
A woman was telling her friend, "It is I who made my husband a millionaire." The friend asked, "And what was he before you married him?" The woman replied, "A multi-millionaire."
After a quarrel, a wife said to her husband, "You know, I was a fool when I married you." The husband replied, "Yes, dear, but I was in love and didn't notice."
Eighty percent of married men cheat in America. The rest cheat in Europe.
Honeymoon: A short period of doting between dating and debting.
I had some words with my wife and she had some paragraphs with me.
I married Miss Right. I just didn't know her first name was Always.
I never knew what real happiness was until I got married... and then it was too late.
I recently read that love is entirely a matter of chemistry. That must be why my wife treats me like toxic waste.
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You know you're really broke when...
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Posted:Sep 26, 2011 8:32 am
Last Updated:May 7, 2024 6:46 pm
31858 Views
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You know you're really broke when...
American Express calls and says: "Leave home without it!"
Your idea of a 3 course meal is taking a deep breath outside a restaurant.
You've rolled so many pennies, you've formed a psychic bond with Abe Lincoln.
Long distance companies don't call you to switch anymore.
You finally clean your house, hoping to find change.
You think of a lottery ticket as an investment.
Your bologna has no first name.
You give blood everyday... just for the orange juice.
McDonald's supplies you with all your kitchen condiments.
You wash your toilet paper.
You have to save up to be poor.
You're in college.
On thanksgiving your dad would bring home a picture of a thanksgiving meal.
You owe yourself money.
Your imaginary friend has more money than you.
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Actual Weird and funny signs.
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Posted:Sep 21, 2011 1:34 pm
Last Updated:May 7, 2024 6:46 pm
30572 Views
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Actual Weird and funny signs.
Apartment building sign:
"No baby carriages or foreign cars allowed in the lobby."
Bar sign:
"Lunch now being poured."
Chinese Laundry sign:
"We don't tear your clothes with clumsy machinery - we do it carefully by hand."
Church sign:
"You must pay for your sins. If you have already paid, you can ignore this notice."
Divorce Lawyer's door:
"Satisfaction guaranteed or your honey back."
Truck sign:
"Pass with care - I chew tobacco."
Orthopedic Surgeon sign:
"Never accept a drink from a urologist."
Taxidermist sign:
"If called by a panther, don't anther."
Psychiatrist advertisement:
"A cure guaranteed or your mania back."
Restaurant Diner sign:
"Everything comes to him who orders hash."
Restaurant Sign:
"Our tongue sandwiches speak for themselves."
Scottish Golf Course sign:
"Members will refrain from picking up lost balls until they have stopped rolling."
Newspaper headline:
"County officials talk rubbish."
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To link to this blog (blkcplnid) use [blog blkcplnid] in your messages.
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