LARGEST BREASTS IN THE WORLD
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Posted:May 13, 2008 12:41 pm
Last Updated:May 14, 2008 1:40 pm
14570 Views
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A MODEL WANTS TO GET HER NINTH BOOB JOB AND HAVE THE LARGEST BREASTS IN THE WORLD:
28-year-old Sheyla Hershey is a model from Houston, Texas, who recently went through her EIGHTH breast enhancement surgery.
Her breasts are now 34FFF . . . but that's not enough for Sheyla. She wants to go bigger and set the record for the largest fake breasts in the world.
But Texas law limits the amount of silicone in a person's body to 1,000 cubic centimeters. Adding more than that could lead to significant health problems. Unfortunately for Sheyla, there's already a gallon of silicone inside her giant chest.
So Sheyla is returning to her home country of Brazil to get her ninth breast enhancement surgery. Even though she already has the record for Brazil's largest fake boobs . . . Sheyla probably won't come close to the world record.
That belongs to Maxi Mounds. In 2003, "The Guinness Book of World Records" said her 42M implants were the largest in the world.
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Not To A Naked...
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Posted:May 12, 2008 8:02 pm
Last Updated:May 16, 2008 7:29 am
14179 Views
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Things NOT to Say to a Naked Man...
That's it?
Wow - look at all the hair on your back!
Maybe you should start going to the gym more.
That was fine, dear...pass me my vibrator?
Thats a shame, maybe we should grab a video instead?
Wake me when it's over, ok?
I think the condom's too big.
Zzzzzz....
You want me to what?!?
Well, that explains the padded pants.
Did you take out the garbage yet?
My husband's in the Marines.
He's due home any day now.
Is that a toupee?
So THAT'S what your ex warned me about!
No.
Surgery might be able to help.
Not until you've showered.
That must be my mother on the phone.
Your brother's bigger.
Your best friend's better.
Are you done yet?
Wow! Look at the size of your.....beer gut!
Size doesn't REALLY matter, dear.
You might want to see a doctor about that.
Hahahahahahahahahahaahahahahahahahahahahaha!!!!!!!!!!!
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The Pickled Penis
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Posted:May 12, 2008 1:59 pm
Last Updated:May 15, 2008 11:09 am
14423 Views
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There was this lady and she really wanted to have sex, but she was to scared to ask her husband so she went to a gypsy and told her her problem.
The gypsy rummaged around in a chest and pulled out a pickle jar with a penis in it, and said "All you have to do is open the jar and say 'Pickle penis my vagina' and it will start having sex with you".
So later she tries out the pickle penis and it works great. That is until her husband walks in and he shouts "WHAT THE HELL IS THAT" and the woman says "It's a pickled penis"
Unfortunately her husband replied "PICKLE PENIS MY ASS" |
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What Is A Mother
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Posted:May 11, 2008 4:59 pm
Last Updated:May 14, 2008 1:56 pm
14231 Views
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| It takes a Mother's Love
to make a house a home,
A place to be remembered,
no matter where we roam.
It takes a Mother's Patience,
to bring a up right,
And her Courage and her Cheerfulness
to make a dark day bright.
It takes a Mother's Thoughtfulness
to mend the heart's deep "hurts,"
And her Skill and her Endurance
to mend little socks and shirts.
It takes a Mother's Kindness
to forgive us when we err,
To sympathize in trouble
and bow her head in prayer.
It takes a Mother's Wisdom
to recognize our needs
And to give us reassurance
by her loving words and deeds.
It takes a Mother's Endless Faith,
her Confidence and Trust
To guide us through the pitfalls
of selfishness and lust.
And that is why in all this world
there could not be another
Who could fulfill God's purpose
as completely as a MOTHER!
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Helen Steiner Rice
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Worlds Smallest
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Posted:May 11, 2008 3:35 pm
Last Updated:May 12, 2008 8:12 pm
14012 Views
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Thumbelina the world's smallest
She may be small, a mere 17 inches and weighing only 60 pounds. But she is all .
Born as a dwarf to a miniature , Thumbelina is officially the world's smallest .
She may never aspire to be a champion show-jumper~she is so tiny she would find it hard to jump over a bucket.
But these things matter little to the feisty Thumbelina, who has been officially recognized as the world's smallest .
That title was conferred on her in 2006 when the five-year-old entered the Guinness Book of Records.
The real-life My Little Pony was born on an American farm to a couple who specialize in breeding miniature horses.
Normally these horses weight about 250lb and rise to a height of 34 inches when they are fully grown.
But from the day she was born it was clear that tiny Thumbelina would never grow to that size.
She weighed in at only 8lb~the size of a new-born baby~when she was born. Eventually she grew to just 60lb.
Her amazing size has been explained as dwarfism. This makes her a miniature of a miniature.
She may be a mini-, but small means beautiful as far as her owners, the Goessling family in Goose Creek farm in St. Louis, are concerned.
She likes to hang out with the cocker spaniels rather than the other horses on their 150-acre farm.
"When she was born, she was so small we thought she wasn't going to make it. She looked very ill. We feared the worse.
"Because her legs are proportionally smaller than her body and her head, she has to wear orthopaedic fittings to straighten them out a lot of the time.
"But we love her and wouldn't want her any other way," said Michael Goessling, whose parents Kay and Paul bred the miniature horses.
She only measures up to the shins of the normal-sized horses in the paddock.
Michael's parents have bred hundreds of miniature horses, but they have never had one as small as Thumbelina. She has become something of a celebrity in her home town in America.
She lives on a cup of grain and a handful of hay, served twice a day.
She is expected to live to the age of 17 years because of her size ~ normal horses live for about 35 years.
"She was just a complete fluke and we call her a mini mini. She is too precious to sell. I think my parents would sell me before they part with Thumbelina. She has that special Wow factor, which you only get when you see how small she really is," said Michael.
While she has the ability to get pregnant and give birth, the Goessling family have decided not to allow this to happen.
There could be complications during the pregnancy, they believe, so it is better to avoid the risks. And also they don't feel it is right that the gene which creates dwarfism in horses be carried on through future generations. |
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4
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Adam and Eve
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Posted:May 10, 2008 10:47 pm
Last Updated:May 13, 2008 3:15 pm
14022 Views
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In the Garden of Eden,
As everyone knows,
Lives Adam and Eve,
Without any clothes.
In this garden,
Were two little leaves,
One covered Adam's,
One covered Eve's.
As the story goes on,
Never the less to say,
The wind came along,
And blew the leaves away.
At the sight,
Adam did stare,
There was Eve's treasure,
All covered with hair.
And wonder came,
Under Eve's eyes,
As Adam's thing,
Started to rise.
They found a spot,
That suited them best,
A nice big tree,
Where they began to rest.
Her legs spread wider,
And wider apart,
While thrill after thrill,
Came into her heart.
The head of Adam's thing,
Peeked into the hole,
And filled her with passion,
Beyond her control.
Backward and forward,
His thing did slide,
And Eve's treasure,
Was all wet inside.
The joy was good,
She wouldn't let loose,
Until Adam's thing,
Was all out of juice.
Then down through the years,
People did screw,
And now it is time,
For me and you.
So pull down your pants,
And lay in the grass,
Cause I'm in the mood,
For a piece of that ASS! |
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4
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Monica Book Titles
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Posted:May 10, 2008 7:08 pm
Last Updated:May 11, 2008 11:06 am
14371 Views
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Possible Titles for Lewinsky's New Book...
I Suck At My Job
What Really Goes Down In The White House
How I Blew It In Washington
You Have to Work Hard to Find the Softer Side of the President
Testing the Limits of the Gag Rule
Going Back for Gore
Podium Girl
Secret Services to the President
Harass is Not Two Words: The Story of Bill Clinton
Deep Inside The Oval Office
The Congressional Study on White House Intern Positions
She's Chief of MY Staff!
Al Gore Is In Command For The Next 30 Minutes
How To Beat Off the Government
Going Down and Moving Up
Members of the Presidential Cabinet
Me and My Big Mouth.
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4
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Picking Your Nose
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Posted:May 10, 2008 4:02 pm
Last Updated:May 11, 2008 6:22 pm
13905 Views
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Deep Salvage Pick
Reminiscent of the deep sea exploration to find the Titanic ship, you probe deep into your nasal passages.
Utensil Pick
When fingers, and even your thumb, just aren't enough to get the job done to your satisfaction.
Extra Pick
When you have been digging for nuggets hours upon hours and suddenly you hit the jackpot! Excitement only equalled by winning the lottery.
Depression Pick
When you're sad, and the only way to fill the void is to pick so hard and fast that the agony overcomes your feeling of remorse and depression.
Pick A Lot
What we would call abnormal amounts of picking. Anything in the three digit realm we consider a bit too much for a 24 hour time frame.
Kiddie Pick
When you're by yourself and you uninhibitedly twist your forefinger into your nostril with childlike joy and freedom.
And the best part is, there's no time limit!
Camouflaged Kiddie Pick
When, in the presence of other people, you wrap your forefinger in a tissue, then thrust it in deep and hold back
the smile.
Fake Nose Scratch
When you make believe you've got an itch but you're really trolling the nostril edge for stray boogers.
Making A Meal Out Of It
You do it so furiously, and for so long, you're probably entitled to dessert.
Surprise Pickings
When a sneeze or laugh causes snot to come hurling out of your nose, and you have to gracefully clean it off your shirt.
Autopick
The kind you do in a car, when no one's looking. Also can mean automatic pick, the one you do when your not even thinking about it, at work, while talking to a co-worker, during a meeting....
Pick Your Brains
Done in private, this is the one where your finger goes in so far, it passes the septum.
Pick And Save
When you have to pick it quickly, just when someone looks away, and then you pocket the snot so they don't catch on to what you did.
Pick And Flick
Snot now becomes a weapon against your sister and others in range around you.
Pick And Stick
You wanted it to be a "Pick and Flick," but it stubbornly clings to your fingertip.
Pipe Cleaner Pick
The kind where you remove a piece of snot so big, it improves your breathing by 90%. |
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Mine are Brown
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Posted:May 9, 2008 8:00 pm
Last Updated:May 20, 2008 10:01 pm
15395 Views
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I pimped this from[blog Lemondrop15484u]and of course I asked first! What color are your eyes?????
Blue Eyes:
People with blue eyes last the longest in relationships. They are kind, pretty or handsome,very good kissers and are really hot. They always fall in love with their closest friends and never understand why. They are very funny, outgoing and don't care what people think or say. They are very satisfying and love to please. Are straight up WARRIORS when necessary. If you mess around with them, they'll knock you out.
Green Eyes:
People with green eyes have the most passion put into relationships,honest and trust worthy, they have long lasting relationships. People with green eyes are also the most beautiful, are fun and outgoing, love to make people laugh, random as hell. They long for the touch of another. They are very laid back. People with green eyes are very sexy and very attracted towards other people. LOVES to party. Tend to cover up true feelings, get scared over relationships.
Hazel Eyes:
People with hazel eyes are very lovable. They are really hot and are awesome to be around. They don't enjoy 'pet names'. They don't care what people think or say. They are lovers, not fighters. But if you mess around, they'll knock you out. They are very satisfying and they love to please. They can exceed your pleasure standards. They are very laid back, chilled and love to just be around.
Brown Eyes:
Either sexy as hell or are adorable. Loves to make new friends. Their relationship tends to be very honest because if they aren't truly in love, then the relationship won't work. They fall easily for their best friends. Will do anything for that special person. Kind and polite. Enjoys being with their guy/girl. LOVES to party. Good in bed. Can make ANYONE laugh or cheer them up. Loves to please the one they care for or love.Is not the kind of person that you want to piss off. |
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10
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Reasons To Be Single
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Posted:May 9, 2008 1:37 pm
Last Updated:May 12, 2008 2:01 pm
14285 Views
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Cooking my own meals would be an adventure, not a punishment.
I wouldn't have to explain why I'm wearing "that" shirt with "those" pants.
I could leave the toilet seat in any position I damn well please.
I could actually tell the bartender, "If anyone calls, I'm here".
I'd be painting the town instead of the house.
When I get home after work, I don't have to start work again.
I could show my girlfriend where I live.
I'd be driving a miniskirt instead of a minivan.
The only weeds I'd be concerned with are the ones I'm rolling.
I would have saved $372,416.21 in groceries by now.
I wouldn't catch so much grief about those skid-marks in my underwear!
I'd get to see what my paycheck looks like.
I'd get to see what my credit cards look like.
You can see a different face when you wake up in the morning, every day of the week!
Going to a strip club doesn't have to be a covert mission.
Bachelors don't have Mother-in-laws.
I wouldn't have to watch sub-titled French films.
I could home drunk to sleep, instead of under a bridge.
I could use my own name at hotels.
I wouldn't have a driving instructor grading me every time I go somewhere.
When asked his opinion, a single guy can say "Hell yes, you're fat!". |
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4
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Things you Learn from Mothers!
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Posted:May 8, 2008 3:04 pm
Last Updated:May 14, 2008 2:00 pm
14162 Views
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Now this is funny but is it also true ????
My Mother taught me LOGIC..."If you fall off that swing and break your neck, you can't go to the store with me."
My Mother taught me MEDICINE..."If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they're going to freeze that way."
My Mother taught me TO THINK AHEAD..."If you don't pass your spelling test, you'll never get a good job!"
My Mother taught me ESP..."Put your sweater on; don't you think that I know when you're cold?"
My Mother taught me TO MEET A CHALLENGE..."What were you thinking? Answer me when I talk to you...Don't talk back to me!"
My Mother taught me HUMOR..."When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don't come running to me."
My Mother taught me how to BECOME AN ADULT..."If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up.
My mother taught me about GENETICS..."You are just like your father!"
My mother taught me about my ROOTS..."Do you think you were born in a barn?"
My mother taught me about the WISDOM of AGE..."When you get to be my age, you will understand."
My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION..."Just wait until your father gets home."
My mother taught me about RECEIVING..."You are going to get it when we get home."
And, my all-time favorite - JUSTICE..."One day you'll have , and I hope they turn out just like YOU -- then you'll see what it's like!".
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4
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Amazing facts about cats!
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Posted:May 8, 2008 12:39 pm
Last Updated:May 10, 2008 1:16 pm
14117 Views
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Did you know...
During her productive life, one female cat could have more than 100 kittens.
In 1952, a Texas Tabby named Dusty set the record by having more than 420 kittens before having her last litter at age 18.
The largest known litter (with all surviving) was that of a Persian in South Africa named Bluebell. Bluebell gave birth to 14 kittens in one litter!
A single pair of cats and their kittens can produce as many as 420,000 kittens in just 7 years.
More than 35,000 kittens are born in the U.S. each year. Spay or neuter your cat.
Cats have 290 bones in their bodies, and 517 muscles.
A cat has five more vertebrae in her spinal column than her human does.
There are three body types for a cat. Cobby type is a compact body, deep chest, short legs and broad head. The eyes are large and round. Muscular type is a sturdy body and round, full-cheeked head. Foreign type is a slender body, with long legs and a long tail. The head is wedge-shaped, with tall ears and slanting eyes.
Sir Isaac Newton, discoverer of the principles of gravity, also invented the cat door.
A cat will amost never "meow" at another cat. This sound is reserved for humans.
Know how old your cat really is. If your cat is 3, your cat is 21 in human years. If your cat is 8, your cat is 40 in human years. If your cat is 14, your cat is 70 in human years.
The average age for an indoor cat is 15 years, while the average age for an outdoor cat is only 3 to 5 years.
The oldest cat on record was Puss, from England, who died in 1939 just one day after her 36th birthday. (We wish we could have them all that long!)
The weirdest cat on record was a female called Mincho who went up a tree in Argentina and didn't come down again until she died six years later. While treed, she managed to have three litters with equally ambitious dads.
A cat's normal body temperature is 101.5 degrees. This is slightly warmer than a humans.
People who own pets live longer, have less stress, and have fewer heart attacks. |
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I Want You
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Posted:May 7, 2008 7:09 pm
Last Updated:May 8, 2008 10:22 pm
13938 Views
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The view from here
Exquisite
Your curves bend like the highway
Enthralling me with your essence
Every soft inch of you
Burning your brand on my soul
Even when passion turns harsh
I crave you.
Want you.
Just can’t stop.
Overflowing love
I can’t contain it
I can’t deny it
I am your fool
I want you
I burn for you
Let me touch you
Where I know it’s good for you
Come to me.
Say you want me, too.
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by Blue Sleighty
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To link to this blog (jeffandBonna) use [blog jeffandBonna] in your messages.
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