tales from my sex phone 2
|
Posted:Jan 15, 2012 1:53 pm
Last Updated:Apr 16, 2013 12:34 pm
5328 Views
|
'Lord,
If you can't make me a better boy,
don't worry about it.
I'm having a real good time like I am.'
Mmmmm it's Fantasy Time sexy...
Read when you have time, no rush Mwah XXX
You decide to host a party introduce me to some naughty people as you know I will enjoy it. We are feeling kinky and horny, fingering, touching each other discreetly when the guest are not looking. You ask me "How much fun do you Really want?" You smile and leave the room I follow......
In the bedroom you have ropes fixed to the ceiling... You strip me slowly and tie my hands above my head. I moan hungrily, you tie my legs open, standing then you tease my Nipples and clit with your tongue. You open the door and call the guest. They come in shocked but excited. I am streched out aching to be touched. I am your plaything, I beg you "Please let them touch me". You nod. They move foward. Men, women. Hands begin to explore me, touching, feeling, thrusting in each hole. I goan loudly beginning to tremble then I feel tongues & mouths violating me. Licking, sucking, darting in & out of my wet pussy and my ass... Where is my Man?!
I look and see you on the bed. I want to please you. I am squirming with pleasure, starting to CUM. I show my pussy to you, then my ass. I purrr "come to me my man Your dick is rock hard". People are still abusing me. Theres a girl who wants to finger my ass. You allow her to prepare it for you. She starts with 1 finger. I gasp. You drip oil on her hand and tell her to give me 2. Then 3. OMG..yes! I tremble as you take over, thrusting your tongue inside my ass and fingers in my hungry pussy. Then with no warning you grab my hips and pull me back onto your dick, ramming me hard. I push my ass against you, loving it so much. I cum, shaking wildly. You untie me and lay me on the bed. Then stand over me, cumming on my face, shooting fiercely. Mmmmmm XXX
|
|
|
0
Comments
|
|
Tales of sex phone 1
|
Posted:Jan 5, 2012 9:59 pm
Last Updated:Apr 16, 2013 12:35 pm
5297 Views
|
Mwah ok I shall do my very best with my story XXX Don't expect to much though swt cuz I do not want TOO disapoint you.
I'm not So filthy really he he x x x Kisses
Ok SEXY...Mmmmm...I bring you home. I tell you i have a surprise for you, We come in , I take you to bed and blindfold you.
Then I strip you slowly. Your dick bursts out of your pants as i remove them, it's hard and huge.
lovely, I stroke it, your nipples and all the way down flicking my tongue around the wet shiny head, just enough to excite you. I move quietly away and I undress. I am now wearing just black slutty lingerie...Crotchless panties, peep hole bra, stockings and heels...I leave the room for a moment, then you hear me return, I tell you to remove the blindfold. You do and find me standing next to a friend of mine. She is dressed like me.
You goan. I tell you "now it's my turn I'm gonna take what I want "...We come to you, one each side, and begin stroking your sexy body, kissing you all over.
We both stop at your heavenly hard dick. Shall we share it? Oh yes! Together we lick the shaft. We take turns to suck you hungrily. You drip on our lips Mmmm.
You are desperate to see us play with each other so we kneel facing each other, over you. You see us lick juices from each others mouths.
We gently touch our nipples against each others, then rub them together. You love it. You reach up and finger our pussies. We both moan, opening our legs wider.
I lie down. My friend watches as you thrust your cock deep into my throat, in and out As you caress her nipples.
She then slides down and sucks my clit. I begin to cum. You pull away and watch as she and I suck each other.
You are excited as we go wild. You pull us up and bend us both over the bed. We open our legs for you and lift our butts. Our holes are ALL open wild and want to be fucked.
We are reaching across, playing each others nipples. You ram us one at a time in our wet pussies from behind, making us tremble.
Then without warning you fuck her ass hard. She screams but I know she loves it. I lie down and open my legs near her face.
You push her face into my pussy, my wet slippery juices covering it as she licks wildly. I cry out that I'm cumming.
You pull on my hard nipples, while you are still fucking her horny ass hard. She screams that she is cumming too, as she opens her hornily ass for more. You cum at the same time,
shooting SO hard that it squirts out of her ass as you ram her, dripping on the floor X X X
|
|
|
0
Comments
|
|
hard to lose
|
Posted:Jan 4, 2012 1:53 pm
Last Updated:Jan 4, 2012 1:55 pm
5090 Views
|
A naked man looks in the mirror and says to his wife,
why do I always get an erection when I look at myself? Wife says
"coz your cock thinks you're a cunt too".
|
|
|
0
Comments
|
|
|
|
The Woodpecker Might have to go lol!
|
Posted:Oct 22, 2011 1:20 pm
Last Updated:Nov 3, 2011 9:41 am
5012 Views
|
May your troubles be less, may your blessings be more,
and may nothing but happiness come through your door.
Don't take life so seriously! Just be safe thats all.
A young Japanese girl had been taught all her life that when she married she was to please her husband and never upset him. So the first morning of her honeymoon the young Japanese bride crawled out of bed after making love, stooped down to pick up her husband's clothes and accidentally let out a big fart. She looked up and said:
'Aww so sowwy... excuse prease, front hole so happy it make back hole laugh out loud.'
|
|
|
0
Comments
|
|
Positive Energy from the Nuns
|
Posted:Oct 17, 2011 11:20 pm
Last Updated:Nov 3, 2011 9:41 am
5168 Views
|
I know what floods my brain in serotonin and gives me positive vibes.
A man suffered a serious heart attack while shopping in a store. The store clerks called 911 when they saw him collapse to the floor. The paramedic rushed the man to the nearest hospital where he had emergency open heart
bypass surgery. He awakened from the surgery to find himself in the care of nuns at the Catholic Hospital he was taken to. A nun was seated next to his bed holding a clip board loaded with several forms, and a pen. She asked him how he was going to pay for his treatment.
"Do you have health insurance?" she asked.
He replied in a raspy voice, "No health insurance"
The nun asked, "Do you have money in the bank?"
He replied, "No money in the bank."
"Do you have a relative who could help you with the payments?" asked the irritated nun
He said, "I only have a spinster sister, and she is a nun"
The nun became agitated and announced loudly, "Nuns are not spinsters!
Nuns are married to God."
The patient replied, "Perfect. Send the bill to my brother-in-law."
|
|
|
0
Comments
|
|
I am here for some real action
|
Posted:Oct 11, 2011 1:02 pm
Last Updated:May 3, 2024 7:6 pm
4969 Views
|
What's the fun of life not to be safe and have fun I think its much better then scaring off a PRICK. Oh yes I love pussy as much as I love myself and know what keeps me happy.
|
|
|
0
Comments
|
|
It's all about Weapons
|
Posted:Oct 9, 2011 1:35 pm
Last Updated:Nov 3, 2011 9:41 am
4958 Views
|
I am a tits lover far by more...
Martha recently lost her husband, and as per his wishes,she had him cremated and brought his ashes home.
Picking up the urn that he was in, she poured him out on the patio table.
Then, while tracing her fingers in the ashes, she started talking to him....
"You know that dishwasher you promised me? I bought it with the insurance money!"
She paused for a minute tracing her fingers in the ashes then said,
"Remember that car you promised me? Well, I also bought it with the insurance money!"
Again, she paused for a few minutes and while tracing her fingers in the ashes she said,
"Remember that diamond ring you promised me? Bought it too, with the insurance money!"
Finally, still tracing her fingers in the ashes, she said, "Remember that blow job I promised you?"
"Well, here it comes."
|
|
|
0
Comments
|
|
|
|
Strange Meets
|
Posted:Aug 18, 2009 10:40 am
Last Updated:Jan 5, 2012 9:46 pm
5784 Views
|
I was walking down the street when I was accosted by a particularly dirty and shabby-looking homeless woman who asked me for a couple of dollars for dinner. I took out my wallet, got out ten dollars and asked, If I give you this money, will you buy wine with it instead of dinner?
No, I had to stop drinking years ago,
Will you use it to go shopping instead of buying food? I asked. No, I don't waste time shopping, I need to spend all my time trying to stay alive.
Will you spend this on a beauty salon instead of food?
Are you NUTS! I haven't had my hair done in 20 years!
I'm not going to give you the money. Instead, I'm going to take you out for dinner with my wife and me tonight.
The homeless Woman was shocked. Won't your wife be furious with you for doing that? I know I'm dirty, and I probably smell pretty disgusting.
That's okay. It's important for her to see what a woman looks like after she has given up shopping, hair appointments, and wine.
|
|
|
1
comment
|
|
BOX
|
Posted:Aug 12, 2009 5:44 pm
Last Updated:Aug 21, 2009 8:39 am
5196 Views
|
A married Irishman went into the confessional and said to his priest, 'I almost had an affair with another woman.'
The priest said, 'What do you mean, almost?'
The Irishman said, 'Well, we got undressed and rubbed together, but then I stopped.'
The priest said, 'Rubbing together is the same as putting it in. You're not to see that woman again. For your penance, say
five Hail Mary's and put 50 in the poor box.'
The Irishman left the confessional, said his prayers, and then walked over to the poor box.
He paused for a moment and then started to leave.
The priest, who was watching, quickly ran over to him saying, 'I saw that. You didn't put any money in the poor box!'
The Irishman replied, 'Yeah, but I rubbed the 50 on the box, and according to you, that's the same as putting it in!'
|
|
|
0
Comments
|
|
BIG BANG PARTY
|
Posted:Aug 8, 2009 2:07 pm
Last Updated:Mar 23, 2015 10:42 am
5820 Views
|
For all YOU party animals.
This bed is perfect to crush on.
Shall we be seeing you at the Party...
|
|
|
2
Comments
|
|
In the lake
|
Posted:Aug 8, 2009 1:47 pm
Last Updated:Apr 8, 2011 12:46 pm
5612 Views
|
One morning, the husband returns the boat to their lakeside
Cottage after several hours of fishing and decides to take a nap.
Although not familiar with the lake, the wife decides to take the boat out.
She motors out a short distance, anchors, puts her feet up,
And begins to read her book.
The peace and solitude are magnificent.
Along comes a Fish and Game Warden in his boat..
He pulls up alongside the woman and says, 'Good morning, Ma'am. What are you doing?'
'Reading a book,' she replies, (thinking, 'Isn't that obvious?
'You're in a Restricted Fishing Area,' he informs her.
'I'm sorry, officer, but I'm not fishing. I'm reading.'
'Yes, but I see you have all the equipment.
For all I know you could start at any moment.
I'll have to take you in and write you up.'
'If you do that, I'll have to charge you with sexual assault,' says the woman.
'But I haven't even touched you,' says the Game Warden.
'That's true, but you have all the equipment.
For all I know you could start at any moment.'
'Have a nice day ma'am.'
Never argue with a woman who reads.
It's likely she can also think.
|
|
|
1
comment
|
|
To link to this blog (juice965) use [blog juice965] in your messages.
|
|
|
| Sun |
Mon |
Tue |
Wed |
Thu |
Fri |
Sat |
1
|
2
|
3
|
41
|
51
|
6
|
7
|
8
|
9
|
10
|
11
|
12
|
13
|
14
|
|
151
|
16
|
17
|
18
|
19
|
20
|
21
|
22
|
23
|
24
|
25
|
26
|
27
|
28
|
29
|
30
|
31
|
|
|
|
|
|
