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A man and his new piece 3/10/2018
A man was lying in bed with his new girlfriend. After having
great sex she spent the next hour just rubbing his testicles
... Something she just loved to do. As he was enjoying it, he turned and asked her, "Why
do you love doing that?" "Because, " she replied ... "I really
miss mine."
0 Comments, 37 Views,
13 Votes
,3.14 Score
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Couple swap 3/7/2018
John and Ted went away for the weekend with their wives.
After a night of partying, John and Ted diuss swapping
wives for the night. John really liked the idea because
his wife was on her period. They agree to it and decide they
will tell each other it the next morning how it went by tapping
their spoon on their cup for each time they have sex <br><br>
At breakfast the next day, John ...
1 Comments, 78 Views,
13 Votes
,2.14 Score
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Never steal a man's beer 3/7/2018
There I was is sitting at the bar staring at my drink when
a large, trouble-making biker steps up next to me, grabs
my drink and gulps it down in one swig. <br><br>
"Well, whatcha gonna do about it?" he says,
menacingly, as I burst into tears. <br><br>
"Come on, man, " the biker says, "I didn't
think you'd CRY. I cant stand to see a man ...
0 Comments, 71 Views,
14 Votes
,4.42 Score
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Dad joke 3/6/2018
What did the dad buffalo say to his when dropping him
off at school....? Bison
0 Comments, 34 Views,
19 Votes
,3.78 Score
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Lol 3/2/2018
Why don't you give Elsa balloons? <br><br>
She will "let em go"
1 Comments, 25 Views,
12 Votes
,2.80 Score
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Learn to Laugh 2/26/2018
People honestly need to have a sense of humor to get through
life. This is me just ranting but i find humor in anything
(sometimes dark humor) but honestly laughing is one of
the healthiest things for you. telling a good joke is a little
trickey though. a good joke can setup the mood and conversation
for the rest of the night or relationship.
0 Comments, 24 Views,
10 Votes
,2.59 Score
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passion junk mail, spam, and scams 2/26/2018
I love this website as a fun place, but talk about jokes:
How about all of the lying messages, fakeprofiles, and
scams that we all receive here. They need their own name.
I am sure that most of you get more of it than I do, and I get
a lot. Vulgarity comes to my mind immediately, but there has got to be a better name for this. Does anyone
have a catchy name they want to share? No one has ...
2 Comments, 55 Views,
10 Votes
,3.19 Score
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69 2/24/2018
Guy fancies a 69 with his mrs but she is on her period. After
much nagging she fianlly conceeds and they get down to business.
Half way through they hear the doorbell. He rolles off her
and she says I can't go look at the state of me, Ive blood
all over my legs, well I cant go either he says I have blood
all over my mouth. Dont worry she says if they ask just say
you've been eating a jam ...
0 Comments, 83 Views,
15 Votes
,3.74 Score
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Looking for Love 2/17/2018
A woman posts an ad in the news paper that looks like this...
Looking for man with these qualifications: - won't beat me up - won't run away from - is great in bed. She got lots of phone calls replying to her ad but met someone
perfect at her door one day. The man she met said, "Hi, I'm Bob. I have no arms
so I won't beat you up and no legs so I won't run away."
So ...
4 Comments, 109 Views,
27 Votes
,4.82 Score
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Olympic Spirit 2/16/2018
Happy sporting husband brings Olympic medals home, and
proudly says to wife , "I'm getting a gold again
tonight ". She says "Go for the silver and come second for a change
"
1 Comments, 41 Views,
23 Votes
,5.23 Score
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fmf threesomes 2/16/2018
Have you read the new book "FMF Threesomes ...by Sharon
Dick
1 Comments, 36 Views,
17 Votes
,4.54 Score
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Is necessary to be an extrovert person in a first date? 2/15/2018
Many people think that to be extrovert o fanny is a good way
for impress your crush, I think it´s just about your personality.
Not its necessary make joks or yes? <br><br>
<br><br>
<br><br>
What do you think about this importan aspect? ...
0 Comments, 23 Views,
13 Votes
,2.30 Score
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Dumb Blond Men 2/12/2018
A blonde man is in the bathroom and his wife shouts: "Did
you find the shampoo?" He answers, "Yes, but I'm not sure what to do...it's
for dry hair, and I've already wet mine." ----------------------- A blonde man sees a letter lying on his doormat. It says on
the envelope "DO NOT BEND." He spends the next 2 hours trying to figure out how to pick
it up. ...
2 Comments, 57 Views,
16 Votes
,4.45 Score
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The Bug 2/11/2018
A man and a woman were driving down the road arguing about
his infidelity, when suddenly the woman reached over and
cut the man's penis off and tossed it out the window.
<br><br>
Driving behind the couple was a man and his 8-year-old .
The girl was chatting away to her father when all of a sudden
the penis splattered into their car windshield, stuck
for a moment, then disappeared ...
3 Comments, 93 Views,
19 Votes
,5.23 Score
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Dogs at the Vets 2/11/2018
Two dogs at the vets. 1st says to the other dog 'What
you here for?' 2nd says 'I keep rubbing myself
up my owners leg so he's having my balls cut off'.
'Ooch' says the first dog. 2nd says 'What
you here for then?'. 1st says 'Look at my owner
she's beautiful, perfect beasts, a tight arse, abosolutely
fabulous. Well she was bending over cleaning the oven ...
0 Comments, 81 Views,
15 Votes
,3.90 Score
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Dogs at the Vets 2/11/2018
Two dogs at the vets. 1st says to the other dog 'What
you here for?' 2nd says 'I keep rubbing myself
up my owners leg so he's having my balls cut off'.
'Ooch' says the first dog. 2nd says 'What
you here for then?'. 1st says 'Look at my owner
she's beautiful, perfect beasts, a tight arse, abosolutely
fabulous. Well she was bending over cleaning the oven ...
1 Comments, 49 Views,
10 Votes
,3.98 Score
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cancer and trumpets 2/10/2018
one diseases asks to another "im a capricorn, what
r u?" <br><br>
..."cancer" says the other <br><br>
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
<br><br>
some girls starts blowing air into a guys di*k during a bj
<br><br>
"what r u doing!" he yells <br><br> ...
0 Comments, 29 Views,
10 Votes
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Talking Pussy 2/10/2018
Do You Know How To Make a Pussy Talk ????? <br><br>
<br><br>
<br><br>
Put a Tongue In It !!!!!
1 Comments, 24 Views,
12 Votes
,4.04 Score
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sex kitten vs. a bear 2/9/2018
Long time ago. I was having a relationship with someone
I shouldn't, so we were sneaking around. We were staying
at a friend's place in Colorado, very cool, rustic,
fireplaces, make-sure-the doors-are-locked because-there-are-bears
kind of place. We were sleeping in separate bedrooms, but
in the middle of the night I decide, very unusually for me,
to be naughty. So I pschye myself into ...
0 Comments, 68 Views,
11 Votes
,1.30 Score
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happy birthday sex 2/9/2018
So it was my 18th birthday. It was about 12:30am at my house,
and my girlfriend of the time and I were laying on the couch
watching a movie. My family had gone to bed earlier, and
my girlfriend turns her head and says to me "I'm
going to give you your birthday present now". We start
going at it on the couch, and everything's going well.
We're in the spooning position, and ...
0 Comments, 61 Views,
5 Votes
,2.49 Score
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i need a eye patch 2/9/2018
I was doing missionary with my ex while in high school. We
were in the gym and I was so turned on I pulled out and blasted
in my own eye. I turned around because my girlfriend had
this terrified look of embarrassment on her face only to
stare into the angry face of her gym teacher while the spooge
dripped down my eye onto my lip. Yeah that was a great day....
1 Comments, 33 Views,
8 Votes
,2.78 Score
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Birds and Bees 2/9/2018
A father asked his 10-year old if he knew about the birds
and the bees. <br><br>
“I don’t want to know, ” the said, bursting
into tears. “Promise me you won’t tell me.” <br><br>
Confused the father asked what was wrong. <br><br>
The boy sobbed. “When I was six, I got the “there’s
no Easter Bunny speech. At seven, I got the “there’s ...
1 Comments, 51 Views,
10 Votes
,5.38 Score
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Pussy fart 2/7/2018
What is a man's first thought while he's having
sex with who ever they're doing it with and hear her
pussy fart. Do you stay serious and keep going on. Laugh
and joke a little about it. Cause when I first heard it the
girl was embarrassed and I teased her about it
0 Comments, 20 Views,
7 Votes
,2.53 Score
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blow job 2/6/2018
Bloke walks into a bar and asks for 39 gin and tonics. The
barman asks 'What you celebrating?' Bloke says
' My First Blow Job' 'Congratulations'
says the barman 'Have one on the house'. 'No
thanks' says the bloke. 'If 39 Gin and Tonics don't
get rid of the taste nothing will'.
0 Comments, 31 Views,
7 Votes
,3.04 Score
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Apples 2/5/2018
A bus driver and a doctor were in love with the same women
<br><br>
The bus driver had to leave for week and before he left
he gave is love 7 apples
0 Comments, 44 Views,
8 Votes
,3.25 Score
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Three Virginal Daughters 2/5/2018
Woman has 3 virgin daughters which all got married on the
same day in a triple wedding. After the wedding receptions
the mother asks the girls if they could let her know how they
are doing on there honeymoons as they have never had sex
before and she wants to know they are okay. The girls agree
and off they go on their seperate honeymoons. After about
three days the mother receives a postcard ...
0 Comments, 92 Views,
11 Votes
,4.66 Score
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Irish Priest at Confessional 2/2/2018
Father O'Reilly always gave Confession and Father
O'Malley would take the service. This went on for years
until one Sunday Father O'Reilly fell ill and could
not do the normal Sunday Confessional. Father O'Malley
being a total novice at confessional asked Father O'Reilly
what he should say. 'Don't Worry' said Father
O' Reilly I wll write down all the sins and ...
1 Comments, 65 Views,
11 Votes
,4.66 Score
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Bath Night 1/31/2018
A couple living in a small Minnesota town take on an 18-year-old
girl as a lodger. She asked if she could have a bath but the
woman of the house told her they didn't have a bathroom
as such but she could use a tin bath in front of the fire. <br><br>
"Monday's the best night, when my husband goes
out to bowl, " the woman said. <br><br>
So the young girl ...
1 Comments, 79 Views,
13 Votes
,5.66 Score
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Oysters 1/30/2018
What noise annoys an oyster?? <br><br>
A noisey noise annoys an oyster!
0 Comments, 9 Views,
4 Votes
,1.30 Score
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50 Shades Darker 1/30/2018
I tell my girlfriend that I'd like to see 50 Shades Darker.
So she punched me in the eye and gave me a cataract.
0 Comments, 14 Views,
6 Votes
,3.08 Score
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