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ed_rush2004 49 M 47  Articles	Wrong Email   8/21/2007 An Illinois lady left the snow-filled streets of Chicago for a vacation in Florida. Her husband was on a business trip and was planning to meet her there the next day. When she reached her hotel, she decided to send her husband a quick e-mail. Unable to find the scrap of paper on which she had written his email address, she did her best to type it in from memory. Unfortunately, ... 0 Comments, 66 Views, 11 Votes ,4.48 Score
ed_rush2004 49 M 47  Articles	Tricking a Nun   8/21/2007 A hippie gets onto a bus and sits next to a nun in the front seat. The hippie looks over and asks the nun if she would have sex with him. The nun, surprised by the question, politely declines and gets off at the next stop. When the bus starts again, the bus driver says to the hippie, "If you want, I can tell you how you can get that nun to have sex with you." The hippie of ... 2 Comments, 164 Views, 19 Votes ,5.89 Score
ed_rush2004 49 M 47  Articles	Condom Slogans   8/21/2007 1. Cover your stump before you hump 2. Before you attack her, wrap your whacker 3. Don't be silly, protect your willy 4. When in doubt, shroud your spout 5. Don't be a loner, cover your boner 6. You can't go wrong if you shield your dong 7. If you're not going to sack it, go home and whack it 8. If you think she's spunky, cover your monkey 9. If you slip between her thighs, be sure to condomize ... 1 Comments, 47 Views, 12 Votes ,4.57 Score
ed_rush2004 49 M 47  Articles	Why Is Sex Like Riding A Bike?   8/21/2007 1. You have to keep pumping if you want to get anywhere. 2. It's best to wear protective head-gear when going into unfamiliar territory. 3. You can do it with no hands, but it's best not to try it until you have a lot of experience. 4. It's easier to learn with the help of someone who has a lot of experience. 5. You can do it by yourself, but it's usually not ... 0 Comments, 48 Views, 11 Votes ,4.10 Score
ed_rush2004 49 M 47  Articles	The Check Up   8/21/2007 An elderly couple scheduled their annual medical examination the same day so they could travel together. After the examination, the doctor then said to the elderly man "You appear to be in good health, do you have any medical concerns that you would like to discuss with me?" "In fact I do, " said the man, "After I have sex with my wife for the first time, I am usually hot and ... 1 Comments, 99 Views, 13 Votes ,5.16 Score
ILLYADEE 58 F 15  Articles	REMEDY FOR GOING BALD   8/20/2007 During his monthly visit to the corner barbershop, this fellow asked his barber for any suggestions on how to treat his increasing baldness. After a brief pause, the barber leaned over and confided that the best thing he'd come across was, er, female juices. "But you're balder than I am, " protested the customer. ... 3 Comments, 112 Views, 9 Votes ,5.35 Score
hornylilwench68 47 F 6  Articles	WAYS TO SAY NO   8/19/2007 WAYS TO SAY NO * I did my own thing and now I've got to undo it. * I have to check the freshness dates on my dairy products. * I have to floss my pets. * I have to go to the post office to see if I'm still wanted. * I want to spend more time with my blender. * I'm attending the opening of my garage door. * I'm ... 1 Comments, 84 Views, 4 Votes ,1.30 Score
hornylilwench68 47 F 6  Articles	Definition Of..   8/19/2007 Q: How do you define “making love”? A: It’s what a woman does while a guy is screwing her.... 2 Comments, 73 Views, 1 Votes ,5.00 Score
hornylilwench68 47 F 6  Articles	Heavy Breathing..   8/19/2007 Q: How is sex a lot like air? A: Because it’s not a big deal unless you’re not getting any.... 2 Comments, 43 Views, 3 Votes ,2.94 Score
hornylilwench68 47 F 6  Articles	A man and a woman are riding next to each other in first class on a plane…   8/19/2007 A man and a woman are riding next to each other in first class on a plane. The woman sneezes, then takes a tissue and gently wipes it between her legs. The man isn’t sure he saw what she did, and decides he is probably hallucinating. A few minutes pass. The woman sneezes again. She takes a tissue and gently wipes it between her legs. The man is about to go nuts. ... 1 Comments, 130 Views, 4 Votes ,4.41 Score
hornylilwench68 47 F 6  Articles	A hug leads to .....   8/19/2007 [B]A hug leads to a kiss...a kiss leads 2 a finger...a finger leads to a a hand...a hand leads to a lick...a lick leads to a suck...a suck leads 2 a fuck. So tell me how many people are you gonna hug after you heard this because sex is like math...u add the bed...subtract the clothes...divide the legs...leave your solution...and pray you don't multiply!... 1 Comments, 76 Views, 3 Votes ,3.43 Score
ed_rush2004 49 M 47  Articles	WHY I'M KNACKERED   8/18/2007 I'm knackered because I'm overworked. The population of this country is 61 million. 31 million are retired. That leaves 30 million to do the work. There are 19 million at school. That leaves 11 million to do the work. 2 million are unemployed and 4 million are employed by the Government to look after us. That leaves 5 million to do the work. One million are in the armed forces, which leaves 4 ... 1 Comments, 55 Views, 12 Votes ,5.10 Score
ed_rush2004 49 M 47  Articles	LETTER AND RESPONSE   8/18/2007 Brad, It would be difficult for me to be any more miserable right now, I feel like the worst person ever. First, let me start by saying that I am truly truly sorry, and I hate myself for hurting you. Of all the people in the whole entire world, you were honestly the last person that I would ever want to wrong in any way. There is no excuse at all or anything that happened, so I won't even try ... 1 Comments, 62 Views, 13 Votes ,4.32 Score
tigerfrog06 48 C 6  Articles	drinking warnings   8/18/2007 Newly issued alcohol warnings The Toronto Board of Health has proposed that warning signs be placed on all alcohol bottles to tip off drinkers about the possible peril of drinking a pint or two of any alcoholic beverage. 1. WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may cause you to wake up with a breath that could knock a buzzard off a wreaking dead animal that is one hundred yards away. ... 2 Comments, 65 Views, 4 Votes ,2.08 Score
ed_rush2004 49 M 47  Articles	Female goes to Dr`s for a check up   8/17/2007 This beautiful woman one day walks into a doctors office and the doctor is bowled over by how stunningly awesome she is. All his professionallism goes right out the window... He tells her to take her skirt off, she does, and he starts rubbing her thighs. "Do you know what I am doing?" asks the doctor? "Yes, checking for abnormalities." she replies. He tells her ... 1 Comments, 152 Views, 15 Votes ,5.27 Score
ed_rush2004 49 M 47  Articles	The Newlyweds   8/17/2007 The newlyweds are in their honeymoon room and the groom decides to let the bride know where she stands right from the start of the marriage. He proceeds to take off his trousers and throw them at her. He says, "Put those on." The bride replies, "I can't wear your trousers." He replies, "And don't forget that! I will always wear the pants in the family!" The ... 1 Comments, 100 Views, 12 Votes ,4.92 Score
ed_rush2004 49 M 47  Articles	25th Anniversary   8/17/2007 A man and his wife go to their honeymoon hotel for their 25th anniversary. As the couple reflected on that magical evening 25 years ago, the wife asked the husband, "When you first saw my naked body in front of you, what was going through your mind?" The husband replied, "All I wanted to do was to fuck your brains out, and suck your tits dry." Then, as the wife undressed, she ... 1 Comments, 100 Views, 11 Votes ,5.97 Score
tigerfrog06 48 C 6  Articles	office game   8/16/2007 ok here is a game that anyone can play especially fun if you work in an office. make sure you come back here to record your scores. Play the Office Game Here's a way to spice up your office. Pick two or three colleagues and agree to play the Office Game which awards points as follows: ONE POINT Run one lap around the office at top speed. Walk sideways to ... 2 Comments, 116 Views, 3 Votes ,1.96 Score
gashapon2 55 M 38  Articles	Dogs Dogs Dogs   8/16/2007 Why are dogs better than men? misses you when you are not home. feels guilty when it does something wrong. doesn't critisize your friends. doesn't feel pressured by your intellegence. You can teach dog. You don't feel suspicious when the mumbling something strange. understands what "no" means. understands that its friends cannot come into the house. Middle aged doesn't leave you for ... 2 Comments, 112 Views, 4 Votes ,2.47 Score
gashapon2 55 M 38  Articles	From Technical Support   8/16/2007 Attn: Technical Support; Subject: A bug in the program. Dear Technical support; Last year I upgraded program Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0, I found there are strange things happening. Program Wife 1.0 started taking up space and valuable resource, which was not mentioned in the manual. Wife 1.0 installs itself and run by itself. It constantly monitor other programs such ... 1 Comments, 45 Views, 3 Votes ,1.47 Score
gashapon2 55 M 38  Articles	10 reasons why sex is better than school   8/16/2007 1. You can finish faster. 2. You can finish together with your partner. 3. You can do it when feel like it. 4. Lots of "How to" videos. 5. You can be as loud as you like in the room. 6. You don't have to worry about the dress code. 7. You don't need a lot of lighting. 8. Theory is not important, focus on action. 9. You don't need to use your brain, just feeling. 10. Whoever you are, the ... 1 Comments, 47 Views, 4 Votes ,1.30 Score
gashapon2 55 M 38  Articles	10 reasons why studying is better than sex   8/16/2007 1. You can always find someone to join you. 2. You can stop when you are tired and won't upset your partner. 3. You can finish as quickly as you like, and don't have to feel guilty. 4. When you open a book, you don't have to worry if someone opened it before you. 5. A cup of coffee and you can go on all night. 6. If you need to go somewhere, you can bookmark it, then pickup where you left ... 1 Comments, 29 Views, 2 Votes ,3.81 Score
tigerfrog06 48 C 6  Articles	new diet plan   8/15/2007 I was in Wal-Mart buying a large bag of Purina for my dogs and was in line to check out. A woman behind me asked if I had a dog ...Duh! I was feeling a bit crabby so on impulse, I told her no, I was starting The Purina Diet again, although I probably shouldn't because I'd ended up in the hospital last time, but that I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an intensive care unit with ... 1 Comments, 187 Views, 9 Votes ,5.99 Score
ILLYADEE 58 F 15  Articles	HONORABLE    8/15/2007 Four Catholic ladies are having coffee together, discussing how important their are. The first one tells her friends, "My is a priest. When he walks into a room, everyone calls him "Father." The second Catholic woman chirps, "Well, my is a Bishop. Whenever he walks into a room, people say, 'Your Grace'." The third Catholic woman says smugly, "Well, not to put you ... 1 Comments, 88 Views, 3 Votes ,4.41 Score
rm_tazmantenn 74 M 2172  Articles	Life   8/14/2007 Life isn't like a bowl of cherries or peaches, it's more like a jar of Jalapenos - - - What you do today, might burn your ass tomorrow.... 0 Comments, 22 Views, 2 Votes ,3.12 Score
splinter672007 57 M 6  Articles	God bless Australian women...   8/13/2007 Three men were sitting together bragging about how they had given their new wives duties. Terry had married a woman from America, and bragged that he had told his wife she needed to do all the dishes and housework. He said that it took a couple days but on the third day he came home to a clean house and the dishes were all washed and put away. Jimmie had married a woman from ... 1 Comments, 137 Views, 5 Votes ,2.82 Score
gashapon2 55 M 38  Articles	Family of three   8/13/2007 At dinner, a wife asked her husband, "How do you feel about us being family of three?" The husband has always wanted a , so he is very exited. "That would be great! When?". "Next week, my mother is coming to live with us!" 1 Comments, 160 Views, 3 Votes ,1.47 Score
Ask me for a photo bluzdrummer 67 M 7  Articles	Love is in the Air   8/12/2007 > One night , after the couple had retired for > > > > The night, the women became aware that her husband > > > > Was touching her in a most unusual manner. He > > > > Started by running his hand across her shoulders and > > > > The small of her back. He ran his hand over her > > > > Breasts, touching them very lightly. Then, he > > > > Proceeded to run his hand gently down her side, > > > > ... 3 Comments, 180 Views, 7 Votes ,2.79 Score
Ask me for a photo bluzdrummer 67 M 7  Articles	Why Men Are Happier   8/12/2007 Why Men are just happier people. What do you expect from such simple creatures? Your last name stays put. The garage is all yours. Wedding plans take care of themselves. Chocolate is just another snack. You can be President. You can never be pregnant. You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park. You can wear NO shirt to a water park. Car mechanics tell you the truth. The world is your ... 1 Comments, 161 Views, 9 Votes ,3.85 Score
sexmachine1450 39 M 4  Articles	barber   8/12/2007 a little girl goes 2 a barbers with her dad & stands next 2 the chair eating a cake while her dad gets his haircut, the barber smiles at her & says "you're going to get hair on your muffin" "i know" she says, "im going to get tits too you dirty old bastard". 1 Comments, 110 Views, 4 Votes ,3.25 Score